From the desk of: Josh & Josh

February 17, 2006
Josh & Josh Celebrity Sighting #357 (Or: Why Josh K. Doesn't Drink Much)
I had two margaritas under my belt. I wasn't as drunk as I was "feeling the vibe." (I'm a lightweight and a cheap date.) So, of course, like a complete idiot, I take the opportunity to introduce myself to the beautiful Jonathan Rhys-Meyers while he innocently stood smoking a cigarette outside the [gay-ish Hell's Kitchen] restaurant we both patronized. Below is the exciting recap of the 30 seconds I spent with him.

Me: Is your name Jonathan?

Rhys-Meyers (with an Irish accent): Yes. Yes, it is.

Me: Wow. It's a pleasure to meet you. Uh. So . . . how's the cigarette tonight?

Rhys-Meyers: It's good, thanks. What's your name?

[Jonathan extends his hand. I take it and shake it.]

Me: Josh. My name is Josh.

Rhys-Meyers: It's nice to meet you.

Me: You, too. Well, I don't mean to bother you. Have a good night.

Rhys-Meyers: You too.

I want to note that, in real life, he looks more like Joaquin Pheonix than Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. Which is odd because he actually is Jonathan Rhys-Meyers. But, still, I thought he might have been Joaquin. Of course, that could have been the result of my pathetic resistance to alcohol. Which is why I don't usually drink. Because I make a complete ass of myself (even more than usual) and say inappropriate things and approach famous people and ask them to describe for me, a perfect stranger, exactly how different the cigarette they're smoking is from the thousands they've smoked before it. I mean, what did I expect? A dissertation? A crotch grap? Fellatio?

Thank god I didn't break out my camera. Because that would have been tacky.

--Josh K.